tennessee vs florida 2025

2025

Of course! Here is a skit based on the premise of two friends, one a Tennessee fan and one a Florida fan, watching their teams play.

Skit: The Third Saturday in September

Characters:

· CHAD: A die-hard University of Tennessee fan. Wears an obnoxiously bright orange jersey.

· DAVE: A loyal University of Florida fan. Dressed in a blue polo and a look of mild superiority.

Setting: Dave's living room. A large TV is showing a college football game. The room is tense.

(The skit opens with Chad pacing nervously in front of the TV. Dave is sitting calmly on the sofa, sipping a drink.)

CHAD

(Clutching his head)

No,no, no! How do you drop that? It hit him right in the numbers! My grandmother could have caught that, and she thinks a screen pass is something you fix on the porch!

DAVE

(Smugly)

Relax,Chad. It's only the first quarter. Gators are just warming up. You know, like we usually do before we win. Again.

CHAD

(Stops pacing and glares at Dave)

"Usually"?Don't you start with that. Not this year. This year is different. I can feel it in my bones. Smokey howled twice this morning!

DAVE

Your dog has indigestion,it's not an omen. Look! See? Our quarterback is about to do that thing he does. The... "making your defense look silly" thing.

(On the TV, the Florida quarterback scrambles for a first down. Dave nods approvingly.)

CHAD

(Angrily shaking a bag of chips)

Agh!He just ran right past them! Our guys were standing there like they were waiting for a bus! Tackle him! It's not a complicated concept!

DAVE

(Leaning forward,his calm demeanor cracking slightly)

Okay,okay. Good play. But your turn. Let's see if your new quarterback is as good as the hype.

(The Tennessee quarterback drops back and launches a deep pass. It's caught for a huge gain. Chad erupts.)

CHAD

(Spilling chips everywhere)

YES!YES! DID YOU SEE THAT? ROCKY TOP, YOU WILL ALWAYS BE... HOME SWEET HOME TO MEEEE! He sings badly and does a terrible dance.

DAVE

(Waving a hand dismissively)

It was one play.A fluke. Our secondary was confused by the... the sheer simplicity of the play call. It was so simple, it was brilliant. We were overthinking it.

CHAD

(Scoffs)

You were"overthinking" getting burned? Sure, Dave. Keep telling yourself that. That's the sound of Neyland Stadium, my friend! Listen to it! He points at the TV where the crowd is roaring.

DAVE

(Stands up,now fully engaged)

Alright,that's it. No more Mr. Nice Gator. It's time to unleash the... He makes a chomping motion with his arms.

CHAD

(Mocking the chomp)

Oh,I'm so scared! The mighty Gator chomp! Looks like you're trying to swat a mosquito. A very, very loud mosquito.

(The game continues in the background. A Tennessee player intercepts a pass. Chad goes ballistic.)

CHAD

(Shouting at the TV)

INTERCEPTION!ORANGE! WHITE! GO BIG ORANGE! I TOLD YOU! THIS YEAR IS DIFFERENT!

(Dave slumps back onto the sofa, head in his hands.)

DAVE

(Muffled)

Unbelievable.He just threw it right to him. It's like he was delivering a pizza. "Here you go, Tennessee, have a free turnover!"

CHAD

(Patting Dave on the back,mockingly)

There,there. Don't be sad. You'll always have... well, you'll always have last year. And the year before that. And the year before that...

(Dave pushes Chad's hand away. The final seconds tick down on the TV. Tennessee has won. Chad is euphoric; Dave is devastated.)

CHAD

(Beaming)

What did I tell you?A new era! The streak is over! It's a great day to be a Tennessee Vol!

DAVE

(Groaning)

I can't believe it.I have to go to work on Monday and listen to Larry from accounting, who owns one orange shirt and suddenly knows everything about football.

CHAD

(Grinning)

Tell him Chad says"Go Vols." Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a date with that entire bag of chips and a whole lot of gloating.

(Chad does his terrible dance again as Dave just stares blankly at the post-game celebration on the TV.)

[CURTAIN]